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Lloyd and Janice Cele. EFF leader Julius Malema recently claimed that Indians are racist, especially toward black people.
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Social Issues. Tweet about this Share this on Facebook. Whiteness, much like gender, is a performance. My experience of the dating scene here in the UK as a brown man from the subcontinent has mostly been negative, and I think my lack of performative whiteness is the problem. There have been several instances when my politeness was mistaken for an unwarranted advance. This has taken a severe toll on my self-perception, often to the extent of paranoia.
This has been proven to me multiple times. For example, a white girl I was briefly seeing made several borderline offensive comments while we were flirting. Will they accept me? Will your community shame you? She said these things quite unabashedly and I chose to ignore them maybe because she was right.
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Women traveling in India are often warned to be careful. But there’s another persistent danger that fewer visitors are aware of: Racism.
My relationship with my identity has always been complicated. I grew up on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, where, more often than not, I was the only black face in a room. Still, my family is extremely Afrocentric, and we celebrated everything from our black skin, to our curves, to the way we styled our hair. Even in those moments when I was the only one like me, my mom and my nana never let me second-guess myself. Despite growing up with confidence, there were times I looked around and wished I had white features.
I spent a huge chunk of my young life attracted to men who preferred my white, Hispanic or lighter-skinned friends.
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Ashley Butterfield has been around the world – but a visit to India brought home the challenges of being a lone black female tourist.
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I’m Black, My Boyfriend’s Asian And We’re Living The Rom-Com We’d Love To Watch
I am lucky to india beaten the odds and to are found a great boyfriend in India, but white did take with effort. I hope you will step outside your comfort zone. You never know where you might find love. Beth Bauer is an author, freelance writer and entrepreneur working as an expat in India, and is soon going rogue.
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